ONE WEEK OFF

That's what this week has been.

We do school all year with a basic schedule of three weeks on/one week off. We take a little extra time in June and December, but otherwise we stick to the three/one schedule. I love it! We never get burned out on school, as we get regular breaks. I always have one week a month to get caught up on random things around the house that are hard to get done during school. We have one week each month to slug around in jammies, hang out with friends without having to tweak our school day, play outside, or do whatever floats our boat. We also maintain a sense of structure in our day during the summer, which keeps everyone in a better mood.

Now, I do relax a little during the summer. We take 2-3 weeks off in June. Then we start our new year with a commitment to get six weeks of school done in July and August, though the days and times we do it are negotiable. That ends up being the same amount of work as the three/one schedule, but allows us the flexibility to enjoy all the fun stuff that fills our calendar during the summer. An extra bonus is that Tim's home during the summer, so he gets to join us for school stuff during July and August.

Anyone else school all year (home, public, private)? What do you like about it? Anything you don't like?

Z - Z - Z - Z - Z - Z

Zoo - We were planning on hitting the zoo with some friends today, a perfect outing on our week off of school. However, we woke up to a temperature of 28 degrees and snow. Needless to say, we won't be strolling around the zoo today. We haven't gone in a while, so it would have been nice to go. Oh well, we'll try another day.

Zonked - Tim loves to take naps with the kids when they're little.



Zucchini - I realize it's winter. The snow falling out my window is proof of that. However, spring will be here soon, which means gardens will be planted. And growing gardens often mean lots of zukes. So I'm going to share a few of our favorite zucchini recipes. It's hard to go wrong with a cookie and zucchini drop cookies are no exception. They're a "cozy" cookie, filled with yummy spices. Want your zukes to be in disguise? Then make a chocolate zucchini cake. You can't even see the zucchini, but it adds a lot of moisture to the cake. And the favorite zucchini recipe at our house? Zucchini cake. It is the absolute best!!!

And that, my faithful blog readers, is the end of the 37 week and 2 day alphabet series.

STILL GETTING SHOWERED WITH BLESSINGS

You guys, God is so good. I don't doubt his ability to provide for our needs, but sometimes it blows me away how often he gives us the fluff of life too. Want to hear what our last few days have been like? Of course you do!

Thursday - We were given an unexpected check from someone who wanted to pay for one month of our utilities. We already have utility money, but now we can put it toward something else for one month.

Friday - We get some junk mail from Nielsen TV Ratings. They've been in our neighborhood all week doing door-to-door surveys. I don't ever watch TV, so I turned the guy down. Well, the "no" houses must be getting a second chance via snail mail. I almost threw the junk mail away, but opened it simply because they've been parked outside our house all week. There was $5 cash in it as a "token of appreciation" for filling out the enclosed survey. I realize that's not a huge chunk of change, but it's free money! So, Tim, who does watch some TV, filled it out and we pocketed the cash. He'll use it to go lunch with a friend.

Saturday - We received a gift card to Circuit City for over $200. It belonged to someone who won't be able to use it up before Circuit City goes out of business, so they totally blessed us with it. Tim's going to have fun shopping with it!!

Isn't that awesome?

I just want to challenge all of you, but particularly those who are broke or who are irresponsible with your money, to be as wise as you can with the money you have and see how God just covers all your needs and blesses your socks off with non-essentials.

1/22/09 THANKFUL THURSDAY

I'm thankful for wake-up snuggles on the couch with the little Ws.

What is something you are thankful for?

CAN YOU FEEL THE LOVE TONIGHT?

I can!! I can!! I can!!

I came home from Bible study tonight with a box of these ...



Don't know what that is? It's a Samoa. Pure delight to the taste buds, the perfect combination of chewy and crunchy. It was given to me by a friend who shares my love of the sweet treat and shared from the stash she has in her freezer.

I was also given a gift card to this place ...

Don't know what that is? It's a place about three blocks away where a person (me, for example) can get a massage. It was given to my by a friend who thinks moms should take care of themselves and is going to give me the massage herself.

I'm definitely feeling the love tonight!! I'm blessed with generous and thoughtful friends!!

A TIMELINE

6/08 Silas joins the grade school group at church. We tell him that we'll budget a certain amount per month for grade school activities. He knows that if costs go above that amount he'll have to use his own money to make up the difference or skip the activity.

9/08-12/08 Despite an income decrease and the loss of a budget for our flex funds, including grade school activities, Silas has been able to attend all grade school events that worked with our schedule. Usually we've had random money to pay for the activities and once his way was paid as a gift.

1/14/09 Silas finds out there will be a grade school bowling night on 1/23 and it costs $20. We tell him that our budget for the month is already done and we don't have the money to send him. He offers to pay his own way, then realizes he only has $13. We talk about how sometimes the Lord provides for things we can't afford and how sometimes we just have to miss out on things we'd like to do. Then we pray, asking the Lord to provide a way to go to the bowling night and accepting the fact that sometimes the answer is "no".

1/15/09 Each of the kids receives an unexpected monetary gift for no other reason than "just because". Silas counts out his stack of one dollar bills. There are ten and when he reaches seven he says "Now I can go bowling!".

1/18/09 Silas takes an envelope to church filled with $13 from his own spending envelope and $7 from the gift and signs up for the bowling night.

Matthew 21:22 If you believe, you will receive whatever you ask for in prayer.

It's neat to share in those faith-building moments with your kids!!

Y - Y - Y - Y - Y - Y

Yahoo - I have e-mail at home!! We've been without a computer since Thursday afternoon when our cord died. The new one arrived in the mail today and I have rejoined a life of modern technology. I'd like to say that I'm quite proud of Tim, who by nature is not a bargain shopper. He was at the library with the computer when it died. Before he called to tell me the bad news he'd already priced new cords online. He ended up getting one through Amazon ... for free!! We don't have any credit cards, but if he signed up for some Amazon card, then he got an instant $30 credit. And the cord was only $20. Woo hoo!! So, we'll spend that extra free $10, cancel the card, then enjoy having a computer at home again.

Yawn - Two weeks ago I got strep. The following week I had a cold. Last week, the week of the cold, also included some late nights, early mornings, and busy days. Needless to say, I've been tired. When I woke up last Friday I told Tim I wanted to cry. That's what exhaustion does to me, it makes me weepy. Well, over the three day weekend I slept 9-11 hours per night (I usually get about 7) and napped for 5 hours (I have a very hard time napping and rarely can, even when I try). I feel so much better this week!!

Yummy - My friend Anna recently told me that she likes having me put links on my regular blog to specific recipes on my recipe blog. So, I thought I'd share a new favorite. I was given a subscription to Taste of Home magazine as a Christmas gift and pulled this recipe from it. It's called Biscuit-y Bell Pepper Muffins and they are so delicious!! We've served them once a week for the last three weeks. I love them!! Be warned, they are not for the calorie counters among us. But they're stinkin' good!!

GUESS WHAT I DID TODAY

I did this particular thing for about 1 1/2 hours.

A COOL PERCENTAGE

One year ago Tim and I committed to putting all our extra money toward the mountain of school debt that we have. Granted, "all our extra money" isn't exactly a large chunk of change, but every extra penny helps. Well, I just did some math. From January 2008 to January 2009 we paid off 15% of our debt! We paid about 5% and the Lord provided about 10%. I know that doesn't seem like a big percentage, but if nothing extra had been put toward our debt in 2008, then we'd only have paid interest all year.

FEELING RELAXED

I've had a really great couple days.

Friday morning was spent playing and doing school, then we delivered a dinner for our church's meal ministry. Back home to wrap up school and eat some lunch. After naps we picked up Granny and brought her over for dinner. She, being the SkipBo champion, smoked Silas, who is getting pretty good himself. Then we all pigged out on Mexican casserole, veggies, and cornbread. A little more visiting, then we took Granny home.

Oops. Forgot to mention Tim left on Friday afternoon for a men's retreat through our church.

Anyway, the kids and I got back home and ate some dump cake. So good!! Then they all went down for bed and I cleaned my room. It was a mess after a week of me being sick and trying to play catch up on life. All the "I'll deal with it later" things were piled in our room. Once that was tidied up I took a long, scalding hot shower and got into jammies. Clean and comfy, I popped in Thou Shalt Laugh and relaxed while working on a blanket I'm crocheting for Naomi. And, no, I don't crochet. However, each kid gets one simple blanket from me. They just keep taking longer to finish with each consecutive child. Then I ate a little more dump cake and hit the sack.

This morning I got to just hang out with the kids. No big "to do" list to work on. It was great. After naps we headed to Camas for a birthday party where we did lots of visiting (me), playing (the kiddos) and eating pizza, cake, and ice cream. Good times!

Tim was back by the time we got home and we're all just relaxing right now. He's playing the guitar, the kids are hanging with him, and I'm on the computer doing my shopping lists for tomorrow morning.

It's been nice. I needed some downtime.

1/8/09 THANKFUL THURSDAY

By the skin of my teeth today ...

I'm thankful for two boys who can play like raving lunatics for an hour, bicker over cleaning up, then put their arms around each other on the couch while they read to each other.

What is something that you're thankful for?

A LITTLE CHEERIER THAN THE LAST POST

I realize the post below this is a bit of a downer, so I'll share two related things that are more upbeat.

First, my dad has a great blog today. Much more positive than mine.

Second, I'll share a poem I cut out of a magazine several years ago.

CANCER IS SO LIMITED
It cannot cripple love.
It cannot shatter hope.
It cannot corrode faith.
It cannot eat away peace.
It cannot destroy confidence.
It cannot kill friendship.
It cannot silence courage.
It cannot invade the soul.
It cannot reduce eternal life.
It cannot quench the spirit.
It cannot lessen the power of the resurrection.

I HATE CANCER

Today is the 17th anniversary of my mom's death. Last year, on the 16th anniversary and in my pre-blogging days, I wrote some things on the Sonlight forums that her death taught me. I eventually shared them here in my first blog post.

Well, this year I don't feel like seeing the positive spin. I hate cancer. I hate that my mom had to suffer through the disease. That my kids, nieces, and nephews will never meet her. That Tim, Josh, Tracy, and Char never met her. That she never saw her kids graduate, marry, or have careers.

I hate that I have reached a point in my life where I feel like I'm racing against her clock. She was 36 when she was diagnosed and almost 39 when she died. I'm 32. Her three kids were 13, 11, and 8 when she was diagnosed and 15, 13, and 10 when she died. My three kids are 6, 4, and 1 (I started having kids three years older than she did). She died in her 30s and I have to get annual mammograms in my 30s.

In my mind, I have four good years left. Logically, I know that's not necessarily going to be the case, but that's where my mind goes. Joining the "dead mom" club as a kid skews your reality.

In my mind, I don't expect to grow old with Tim. I expect one of us to die prematurely. Logically, I know that's not necessarily going to be the case, but that's where my mind goes. Seeing your dad widowed when you're a kid skews your reality.

In my mind, I question whether to adopt a child that could end up suffering the death of a parent just a few years later. Logically, I know that's not necessarily going to be the case, but that's where my mind goes. Seeing your mom and the parents of several other kids in your community die within a year skews your reality.

The worst fear of many moms is having their children die. That's normal. My worst fear is dying before my kids are raised.

X - X - X - X - X - X

The plan for today, based on the fact that I'm sick.

X School - I didn't do any school with my kids today.

X Housework - I didn't do any housework today.

X Playing - I didn't play with my kids today.

A LITTLE SWITCHEROO

Due to the fact that Webshots has become a royal pain in the neck, I just switched to Picasa. You can still see old pics here, but from now on new pics will be posted here. Both links will stay on my sidebar.

New camera, new year, new hosting site.

And I just loaded pics today!! Go check them out!!!

PRACTICAL PARENTING

A little over a year ago I was asked by some other moms to share some parenting tips with them. Needless to say, but I'll say it anyway, we are far from perfect parents. Plus, we don't really subscribe to any particular method of parenting. The way we parent is just a lifestyle, not some ten point strategy we came up with. So, it was a little tricky for me to come up with what to tell these moms. I eventually came up with some tips, which we hashed out together while brainstorming ideas for each other.

Flash forward to Christmas day. Someone who is pregnant with her first child asked me how we go about parenting. Ironically, I felt like my kids were amped and out of control at that moment, so I just started laughing. Anyway, I came up with three key things, the nitty gritty of parenting, and e-mailed them to her. Then I remembered the discussion I'd had a year ago and discovered I had those tips on my computer!!

So, I'll just share them here in case they'd encourage someone else. Well, first I'll tell you the three nitty gritty ones.

1. Be firm. Know your expectation, let your children know it, then enforce it.
2. Be consistent. Inconsistency in parenting is a surefire way to shoot yourself in the foot.
3. Be a team. Make sure both parents are involved in playing, snuggling, training, and discipline.

And here is what I typed up for those moms who I talked to about a year ago. This list is by no means exhaustive, but I was just sticking to the real basic stuff.


BETHANY’S BEST TRAINING TIPS

Do make your expectations clear. Set the standard for your family and remind them of it regularly. Role-play and discuss situations they have been or will be in. Make sure your expectations are realistic for the age and development of your child.

Do be consistent. Inconsistency is your biggest enemy in training your children. It is confusing and frustrating for a person to never know what type of response their behavior will get.

Do use wise/foolish and positive/negative. All choices have consequences. Wise choices lead to positive consequences and foolish choices lead to negative consequences.

Don’t make empty threats. If expectations are made clear, then threats aren’t really necessary. However, if you do make them, then you better follow through. Failing to follow through just teaches your kids to not take you seriously.

Do think long-term. What do you want your child to be like next month? Next year? In ten years? What do you need to do right now to help that happen?

Don’t count. Delayed obedience is disobedience.

Do use natural consequences. The more closely you can relate the consequence to the behavior, the more likely foolish behaviors will stop and wise behaviors will continue. Make the punishment fit the crime … and the criminal.

Do acknowledge improvement. If your child succeeds at something you’ve been working with them on, then a simple “you did that perfectly” or “that was exactly what I want you to do” will reiterate your expectations and affirm their effort.

Do expect a response. You child needs to learn basic communication, you need to know that your instruction was heard, and it can help keep your child focused.

Do ask others. Be aware of your child’s behavior when you aren’t around. Let them know that you will be asking about their behavior when you pick them up. Deal with any behavioral problems that occurred while you were away from your child.

Do pay attention to each child’s needs and temperament. Change your approach if what you’re doing isn’t working. Let some issues slide for a couple days in order to focus on a greater issue.

MY FICKLE FAITH

As you know, we've had an interesting few months financially with Tim's cut in pay and Devon's hernia emergency. However, we've seen God provide our needs each month, plus we've been blessed with some of the fluff of life too. God is good. I know that to be true.

However, I had a little panic attack yesterday when we were faced with a large, unexpected expense. My faith is strong when the provision is in sight, but not when faced with an unplanned need. I guess that doesn't make it faith at all, since faith is believing in the unseen. Maybe I'm strong in thankfulness, but not in faith.

As you know, I tend to be a bit of a planner. This is not a bad thing, in fact I consider it a strength. I think there is wisdom in planning ahead, pacing things in order to be prepared for what is in the future.

Proverbs 6:6,8 Go to the ant, you sluggard; consider its ways and be wise! It stores its provision in summer and gathers its food at harvest.

However, the problem comes when a crisis happens and I freak out about how it's going to mess up my careful planning for the future. I can be overly consumed with what's happening down the road.

Matthew 6:34 Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own.

There's a balance somewhere. We do need to be wise with our money and plan for the future, but we shouldn't be obsessed to the point of stressing out when life interferes with our plans.

I've shared these verses before, but here they are again.

Proverbs 30:8b-9 Give me neither poverty nor riches, but give me only my daily bread. Otherwise, I may have too much and disown you and say, "Who is the Lord?" Or I may become poor and and steal, and so dishonor the name of my God.

There is nothing inherently wrong with wealth or poverty, but we need to keep things in perspective. All we truly need is our daily bread, our immediate needs being met.

So, here's the what happened yesterday. We had some money we were saving for hernia payments over the next few months, knowing we'd pay the balance off with our tax refund. When the unexpected expense appeared I freaked because we didn't have the money for it.

But I simply had to change my perspective and attitude. God had provided for this expense, it just wasn't how I planned. My plan was to save some money for hernia stuff, but God knew we'd have this random expense and that we'd have money saved that we could dip into. I was letting my plan for the future cloud my view of God's provision for the present. My plan was good, but his plan was perfect.

Isaiah 55:8-9 "For my thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways my ways," declares the Lord. "As the heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways higher than your ways and my thought than your thoughts."

God gave us our daily bread. He provided for an unexpected need yesterday. And you know what else? Remember my free sheets I told you about yesterday? Well, he's also provided a free bed. The fluff of life.

To think I was worried about the provision for a need. I have fickle faith. I'm working on changing that though.

HODGE PODGE

That's what I have for you today.

We got a new kitchen faucet today! Our old one suddenly had about 10% of the normal water pressure. The landlord couldn't figure out what the problem was, so he gave us a new one. Goodbye to the faucet with two knobs and hello to the faucet with one handle.

Silas spent Tuesday on Mt. Hood with the grade school group from church. He had a blast!! He also lost a mitten, a pair of gloves, and a brand, spankin' new sweatshirt. Stinker. We're hoping those things will be in the lost and found on Sunday. Time will tell. Anyway, the church finally got pics from the trip up on the grade school blog. You can see a movie of Silas tubing down the mountain, or pics of him scarfing pizza (last pic), his back as he pulls up the rear of his group trudging up the mountain (third pic), forming snowballs (last pic), and getting loaded onto his tube by Big Silas (second pic).

I just finished a book last night, which I'll include in my book list for this month in a few weeks, about a place called Hope Meadows. Oh my! This place is simply amazing. If there was something comparable in the Portland area, then we'd be doing everything we could to move in. Check it out right here.

New sheets!! Perhaps we're a little behind the times when it comes to linens, but we weren't aware that fleece sheets existed until a month ago. I just got back from Fred Meyer, where I got a set of blue fleece sheets ... at half price ... with a gift card. Can't beat that, huh? Our bed needs to be replaced and we'd like to go up from a full to queen. So, I bought the sheets in queen and am off to find a free or cheap bed on Craigslist. Woo hoo!!

As a bargain shopper, I'd encourage anyone who needs winter clothing or household stuff to get it now. Prices are slashed everywhere! In fact, I'll be getting next year's Christmas Eve gifts (new jammies) for the kids in the next week or two. I refuse to pay full price for anything unless it's absolutely unavoidable.

Naomi is cutting four teeth. She also came down with a cold on Christmas night. It's been a long week. That's all I have to say about that.

Remember how I told you that Ciara was gone? Well, I had bookmarked her personal site and one day it was unavailable. I hadn't been to the main site since then. Until a week ago, that is. That's when I saw her pic on the site, though her personal site still comes up as unavailable when I click on her pic. Oh my heart! Is she gone or not?! I e-mailed NWAE and they said her case worker put her on hold. I have no idea what that means, though I'm assuming it's like "sale pending" on a house. I wrote back to get more info, but haven't heard anything yet. You guys, she stole my heart. I realize the chance of her becoming a W is slim to nothing, but the yo-yo of she's there/she's not there is killing me.

In other adoption news, we will probably use our tax refund to pay for a home study. Just another step in getting our ducks in a row. We don't know when we'd adopt a child, but we want to be ready when the right one comes along.

Devon has spent almost the entire week in jammies. He loves jammy days!!

The boys and I were the only ones who went to church on Sunday. As we were waiting for church to start the man next to me asked if Silas was adopted. I haven't been asked that in a really long time. Generally I respond to that with "no he's not and if you knew my husband, then you'd be asking if Devon was adopted". However, my brain temporarily left my body and I just said "nope". "So, they're both yours?". "Yep". Now, I know some people will get their panties in a wad over that conversation, but it doesn't bother me. It just comes with the territory. And if you're someone who is offended by such a conversation, then please make sure you only marry, conceive or adopt people who have the same skin tone, nose width, eye fullness, and hair texture as yourself. Just sayin'.

And that's that. I'm off to make lunch and look for a bed.

1/1/09 THANKFUL THURSDAY

I'm thankful for Pandora, which has been giving me a steady stream of worship music today.

What is one thing that you are thankful for?