Anxious People, written by Fredrik Backman and translated from Swedish by Neil Smith
An apartment viewing, a foiled bank robbery, and random group of people with an assortment of personal problems. It's a story that reminds the reader everyone is dealing with a struggle of some sort, we're more similar to everyone else than we think we are, vulnerability is important, and we never fully know how intertwined our lives are with other people's. Backman does a great job of creating characters you love (even the ones you don't like) while sharing the challenging parts of their life in a way that's both endearing and funny. As a sidenote, there's a lesbian couple in the story. I mention that simply as a courtesy for my friends who wouldn't be comfortable with that aspect of the plot, as it's not mentioned in the book description on Amazon, but it's not a topic to be discussed here. I chose this book for the "by a Scandinavian author" category of a reading challenge I'm doing this year. Please note the pages listed for the following quotes are from the large print edition.
p. 42, Because that was a parent's job: to provide shoulders. Shoulders for your children to sit on when they're little so they can see the world, then stand on when they get older so they can reach the clouds, and sometimes lean against whenever they stumble and feel unsure.
p. 56, Drugs are a sort of dusk that grant us the illusion that we're the ones who decide when the light goes out, but that power never belongs to us. The darkness takes us whenever it likes.
p. 100, The truth of course is that if people really were as happy as they look on the Internet, the wouldn't spend so much d*** time on the Internet, because no one who's having a really good day spends half of it taking pictures of themselves.
p. 157, "One technique I'd recommend is to as yourself three questions before you flare up. One: Are the actions of the person in question intended to harm you personally? Two: Do you possess all the information about the situation? Three: Do you have anything to gain from a conflict?"
p. 301, When you're a child you long to be an adult and decide everything for yourself, but when you're an adult you realize that's the worst part of it.
p. 339, Nothing is easier for people who never do anything themselves than to criticize someone who actually makes an effort.
p. 405, "If you can do something for someone in such a way that they think they managed it all on their own, then you've done a good job."
p. 431, But if there's one thing modern life and the Internet have taught us, it's that you should never expect to win a discussion simply because you're right.
p. 448, ... they had all heard one another's stories, and that made it harder to dislike one another ...
p. 513, Sometimes we don't need distance, just barriers.
Atomic Habits: An Easy & Proven Way to Build Good Habits & Break Bad Ones, written by James Clear
This book isn't about specific things that must be done to achieve specific goals, but focuses instead on a few general strategies that are applicable to any kind of habit the reader may want to change. Using simple, strategic approaches to small habits, there will eventually be significant, long-lasting changes in whatever area of life a person chooses to work on. I chose this book for the "published in 2018" category of a reading challenge I'm doing this year.
p. 18, Time magnifies the margin between success and failure. It will multiply whatever you feed it. Good habits make time your ally. Bad habits make time your enemy.
p. 22, All big things come from small beginnings. The seed of every habit is a single, tiny decision.
p. 23, Goals are about the results you want to achieve. Systems are about the processes that lead to those results.
p. 24, Goals are good for setting a direction, but systems are best for making progress.
p. 54, Whenever you want to change your behavior, you can simply ask yourself:
1. How can I make it obvious?
2. How can I make it attractive?
3. How can I make it easy?
4. How can I make it satisfying?
2. How can I make it attractive?
3. How can I make it easy?
4. How can I make it satisfying?
p. 71, I will [BEHAVIOR] at [TIME] in [LOCATION].
p. 73, No behavior happens in isolation. Each action becomes a cue that triggers the next behavior.
p. 86, Making a better decision is easy and natural when the cutes for good habits are right in front of you.
p. 95, People with high self-control tend to spend less time in tempting situations. It's easier to avoid temptation than resist it.
p. 108, Desire is the engine that drives behavior. Every action is taken because of the anticipation that precedes it. Its is the craving that leads to the response.
p. 117, One of the most effective things you can do to build better habits is to join a culture where your desired behavior is the normal behavior.
p. 158, Create an environment where doing the right thing is as easy as possible.
p. 175, The average person spends over two hours per day on social media. What could you do with an extra six hundred hours per year?
p. 189, With our bad habits, the immediate outcome usually feels good, but the ultimate outcome feels bad. With good habits, it is the reverse: the immediate outcome is unenjoyable, but the ultimate outcome feels good.
p. 233, Improvement requires a delicate balance. You need to regularly search for challenges that push you to your edge while continuing to make enough progress to stay motivated.
p. 246,
(Annual review questions)
1. What went well this year?
2. What didn't go so well this year?
2. What didn't go so well this year?
3. What did I learn?
(Integrity report questions)
1. What are the core values that drive my life and work?
2. How am I living and working with integrity right now?
3. How can I set a higher standard in the future?
p. 249, When you cling too tightly to one identity, you become brittle. Lose that one thing and you lose yourself.
The Golden Goblet, written by Eloise Jarvis McGraw
This is the fictional story of an orphaned Egyptian boy who wants to become a master goldsmith, following in the footsteps of his goldsmith father, but is forced to live with a cruel half-brother who won't allow it. It's a good story of crime and friendship, poverty and wealth, mystery and hard work that I read to Tyler for school.
The Immortal Life of Henrietta Lacks, written by Rebecca Skloot
The true story of a woman whose cells radically changed the medical world, even though neither she nor her family were ever told they'd been harvested. It's a book that makes you consider science, medical ethics, and patients' rights, but it's also about racism, poverty, and how trauma impacts people in different ways.
Three Weeks with My Brother, written by Nicholas and Micah Sparks
The chapters of this memoir each have two parts. One is about a specific stop in a three week trip around the world the brothers took together, the other is about the experiences they've shared. It's about a lifetime of shared struggles and joys, as well as each coming alongside the other through their personal highs and lows. I chose this book for the "about travel" category of a reading challenge I'm doing this year.
p. 113, "In the end, marriage comes down to actions. I think people talk too much about the things that bother them, instead of actually doing the little things that make a marriage strong."
p. 187, When you chase a dream, you learn about yourself. You learn your capabilities and limitations, and the value of hard work and persistence.
p. 338, No longer interested in society's definition of success, he began purging his life of material things. Life, he decided, was for living, not for having, and he wanted to experience every moment that he could. At the deepest level, he'd come to understand that life could end at any moment, and it was better to be happy than busy.
Tisha: The Wonderful True Love Story of a Young Teacher in the Alaskan Wilderness, as told to Robert Specht
While this book is a love story as the subtitle states, it's more than that. It's about nineteen year old Anne Hobbs venturing into the Alaskan wilderness to teach in a tiny school, learning much about the land and its people in the process. Covering the nine month period of a single school year, it's a story of strong people, a rugged environment, blatant racism, the humility to be teachable when wrong, and a determination to do what's right in the face of opposition. It reminded me a bit of The Year of Miss Agnes, except it's true and written for older readers. I chose this book for the "originally published in the year you were born" category of a reading challenge I'm doing this year.
