I said we'd talk about it over the break, partly because I wanted to wait until he'd gone to his conference that was scheduled for last Monday (conferences are mostly student led and I didn't know if his feelings would change if he saw a summary of his school experience in black and white), and then we'd make a decision. Every day he has become more confident that he doesn't want to go back. We had a lengthy discussion about the pros and cons of both staying in school for the duration of the year and of coming home now. We also discussed the problems of last year and how we would do things differently if he came home now (or next year, for that matter).
The boy is Silas. Nothing bad has happened, he has a list of things he loves about public school, his teachers and administrators have been great to work with, he's made lots of friends, and it's been a positive experience ... but he wants to homeschool again.
Classes start in less than 36 hours and we need to make a decision. No, we don't have to decide by then, but we have to make a decision at some point and there's no sense in dawdling.
On one hand I would love to have him home, think a new way of doing things at home would work well, believe his time at public school was a good experience on multiple levels, but don't see any point in keeping him there if he'd rather not be and we have another option available to us.
On the other hand I believe there is a lot of value in sticking something out to the finish, especially since there's nothing horrible going on that would make us withdraw him without question. And, if I'm going to be totally honest, I think it's really awkward to do a bunch of fundraisers for outdoor school, then bail on the school altogether. I know outdoor school isn't a reason to stay in public school, but still ... that just seems ... I don't know ... unethical or something.
So, yeah. Big decisions looming. As always, schooling choices aren't lifetime commitments and I'm so glad we put Silas and Devon in public school this year. It was the right choice, no doubt about it. But now we need to do some more deciding. I'm not stressed about it, we simply need to choose one or the other.
Maybe I'll flip a coin.
6 comments:
I have an opinion if you want it.
~Kore
Kore - Give it to me! :)
Oh, man! I will be praying for clarity in the decision making process!
Well, I lied. I don't have an opinion on what YOU should do. You know you, you know your child. I guess I know what *I* did when I was you, and what I would do now, if I were you. When Joelle went to school in 8th grade with Eric, it turned everyone's life upside down. It was kind of at that point that we realized she had some pretty serious social holes. Not the nerdy, pick-her-nose in public and don't know how to walk or talk like a normal person holes--both our girls are very socially savvy that way. It was more 'don't know how to keep a friend' hole. Or don't know how to thwart pushy boy attention kind of hole. Several others like that. She also had work ethic holes. She is a HARD worker. She holds down jobs and does well in school and keeps up at home. But because I had been her teacher for all those years, when the going got tough, the tendency was for us to skip over or avoid those academics that irritated one or both of us. So it was near impossible for her to grasp the consequences that come in a public school setting when a student just doesn't want or see the worth in an assignment. She still struggles with this--authority for her is primarily negotiable and yes, this is a parenting default, but probably only one that could be overcome by an authority OTHER than us.
Ultimately, we brought her home. Ultimately, she has STILL had to learn and develop those crucial skills. But she's 18, and expected to know better. I would have rather her learned them then. I would rather have left her in. At least for the year. I know this flies in the face of the homeschool mantra...but there are, for some kids, things that must be learned in the care of another. I wish she would have learned them earlier than later. I would analyze carefully why you put your son in school in the first place--and if he went to school to learn some things you cannot teach, I can promise you he probably has not learned them yet, but is about to learn them, and you should not short circuit the process when the process has just begun. (and I guess I lied twice, because it turns out that I did have opinion in all that! haha)
Kore - Thanks for sharing your opinion. You make excellent points! :)
I'm definitely not one to subscribe to any stereotypical homeschool mantra, so I don't mind you flying in the face of any that exist. I think my school mantra is "seize the best opportunity that's available, the one that will best meet the needs of your child and family at any given point in time". Sometimes that's homeschooling, other times it's anything *but* homeschooling. :)
My kids learned some of the same things that that Kore's did from school. How to work hard (even on things that are tedious and seem worthless), be persistent, and be accountable to someone other than me.
That doesn't mean that school is right for your boy, of course. Just sharing that similar experience.... that being in school is so much more than academics (which of course you know).
I'll pray for wisdom to make the right decision.
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